How not to potty train

Since writing about Potty training nightmares a few weeks back, things have only gotten worse. My poor 3 year old far from feeling encouraged by all of our efforts to potty train him decided instead to resist and stop wanting to wee and poo altogether. This resulted in a few days of begging and pleading with him, putting nappies back on, taking him on and off the toilet, giving him drinks and generally despairing. He was able to hold out for most of each day, even though that involved some obvious pain and lots of hopping around. He did most of his wees overnight when he was sleeping.

I was so worried about him that I tried to make a doctor's appointment but was only able to see a nurse. She advised me to put away the potty and not mention it for a while, and to put my 3 year old back in nappies. Maybe it's my paranoia but I detected a tone of judgement for my bad parenting. My 3 year old (S) had shown all of the signs of being ready to potty train and was really happy to be wearing his big boy pants.

The following day he was willing to try and wee but he was in so much pain as he did it, and also was lying on the sofa feeling really poorly. My husband rang up the doctors again and although he swears he asked to see a doctor when I took S back it was another nurse practitioner. She asked me to collect a urine sample (easier said than done) and so I delivered that back the following day (Thurs). On Fri when we called back to get the results but they had been sent off for analysis and so we would have to wait over the weekend.

On Monday when we called back my husband was able to at least speak to a GP on the phone, and she told him that S doesnt have a urine infection and prescribed some laxatives. Nearly a week later he is still in discomfort when weeing, so on Thursday I called the doctors again and pleaded to see an actual doctor. As usual they offered me either a nurse practitioner or a phone conversation with a doctor. I held out for a physical appointment and was offered one 8 days later. I attempted to negotiate but to no avail. So we are still waiting for that one and meantime S does seem to be improving.

So what do we do next? S is back in nappies full time, we have to give him a break from the idea of potty training and hope that he doesn't have all these negative associations with it when we try again later. Here's hoping for a few more parenting victories to make me feel a bit more competent as a mummy :-)